material world

i lost my digicam. it's the thing that's making me depressed nowadays. ironically, what most of my friends tell me is, "try not looking for it. susulpot din yan." and based from experience, to some extent it's true. the less you look for it, the more possibilities it will show up, just like it was never lost. the funny thing about this is that things somehow have lives on their own.

this leads me to think what made a lot of us turn materialistic. at this day and age, one can't help but be materialistic. and at this point, i have realized that being materialistic is not as bad as how we thought it was, especially when we were kids. i'm not saying this just because this is the norm. i realized that things happen to give us the same thrills that relationship or other people give. i don't remember if i mentioned this in my past entries, but my boss in my internship program last year said that according to medical studies, the hormones released when we get excited or happy in a relationship is the same as the hormones released when we get excited and delighted as we own or even just stare at the things that we aspire to have. so, concluding from this study, both human beings and objects are stimulants of the same kind.

perhaps most would protest the way i equate material objects to relationships. i myself do too. but coming from heartaches and depression caused by human relationships, it's the material goods that kept me sane. not wholly but a big part of it. these material objects direct my attention away from staring at the horizon and pondering philosophically about what has happened and what is happening to my life, which in turn depresses me.

to a lot of people, objects deserve more of their attentions. why? for one, these objects have no emotions-- you don't have to deal with brats, complaints, nags, demands, etc. etc. they give what you give. in most instances, these things make you happy exponentially, not the other way around. and the only time they disappoint you is when they don't deliver their jobs well, which are often caused by our mistakes. unlike with human relationships. you have to deal with a lot of things. add to that is the worst, expectations. and what's sad is, there's never an equal proportion in a relationship. whatever you give does not necessarily equate to what you receive and vice versa. most of the time, you give so much and yet you get worse than nothing. in my case, this is what usually happens.

however, at the end of the day, these objects have expiration dates. and a lot of relationships too. but the happiness that an object gives is merely superficial. these objects don't have emotions. these objects don't understand, love, and appreciate us the way we want to be understood, loved, and appreciated. memories are made of genuine companionships that make us better people, not lazier ones. our real friends bring out the best and worst in us, and remains with us in happiness and depression. relationships and people in general give one thing that no object can ever deliver-- our worth in this world.