odd jobs

an odd day indeed. while i was seriously thinking about what to cram in my thesis, some crazy thought distracted me. i thought, what odd job am i actually game for?

*warning: i would be exposing my mischevous side of me in this post. and obviously, i would only want to have these jobs for a day (or more like, i can only keep these jobs for a day), considering how soon i'd get fired once i start playing around.

1. the girl behind the mascot of whoever. nope i didn't have jollibee in mind. rather, our purple tastebud friend grimace. why? well i guess, he's the only one who seems huggable and child friendly (in spite not knowing what he actually is). i remember when i was a kid, i didn't even want to get near ronald nor his criminal friend hamburglar or even birdie. (come to think of it, how do mcdonald's expect the kids to actually enjoy the company of a criminal?! oh and frankly speaking, for the one who thought of grimace as a tastebud, i could not classify him/ her as creative, imaginative, or queer. have you created a decent explanation that would be good enough to explain to your future kids his identity?).

2. have you seen those body-painted guys in eastwood and manila baywalk? the pseudo-statues that earn P2,500 a day. yep. you read me right. they are pretty well compensated. and all they have to do is to stand still and scare some kids whenever they feel the need to move their bodies. and of course, though i do get shy of getting my picture taken, i wouldn't mind considering i'm unrecognizable anyway.

3. a pager hotline operator. too bad pagers are now officially extinct nowadays. you see i remember, my friends would give the craziest message that would take forever for the operator to know about.

friend (in a ngo ngo voice): hengo?

operator: yes sir, can i have the pager number please?

friend (still in a ngo ngo voice): nge nguwa ngay ngu ngu ngri ngebeng.

operator: sir, can i have it again?

*repeat last two lines five times

*finally, operator gets it

operator: can i have your name?

friend: ango mischer ngua. ingkaw engtingde?

operator: come again sir?

*again, repeat last two lines another five times

*finally, operator gets it

operator (sounding irritated, pissed, getting impatient): your message sir?

friend: ingaw pungta rito bingongdo, bilisang mo.

operator: come again sir?

*repeat last two lines, thrice

*getting a bit used to it, the operator gets it already third time

*next thing you hear is a dial tone from the operator.

that actual conversation lasted for more than ten minutes, mind you.

and yes, i would love to actually fool those prank callers such as my friend.

and yes, it would definitely be interesting to eavesdrop on their messages.

and yes, it would be fun to comment something crappy after a sweet message is to be relayed.

and yes, wouldn't it also be interesting to mix up the message or totally change it to its opposite. :)

... more to come...