a badly needed holiday

at around four fifteen this afternoon, i found myself suddenly blank. prior to that, i just came from power plant to take some pictures at play underground for a project, then went to book wagon to look for a potential christmas gift (unfortunately the barry manilow piano book that i was looking for was already sold and if i place an order, the copy would be here in april--too late for christmas), then went to rustan's to shop for pita bread, tuna, and dressings. so i was with a friend, on board the car and was talking with another friend over the phone since her group needed help for some project. my dad called my driver, and few minutes later, my phone had call wait and it was my mom. wasn't able to answer so, she called my driver. asked me some questions, so was the friend who was with me, and i was getting crazy.

i was spaced out. couldn't even react to anything. it took me a while to get back to normal. there are just so many things in my mind right now. i'm supposed to take a field trip to the different museums in manila, then do this project for pr, then read the hundreds of pages of handouts and books for school, then there's the bowling marathon this sat. is fpj running? who will i vote for? should i even apply for work this december? when will i shop for christmas? who are the ones i'm giving gifts? my parents are separating and should i be happy about it? in court hearings for this case, should i attend? how do i deal with my other problems?

it's just the second week of school and everything's gone bad. real bad. i can't afford to enjoy doing what i used to do a lot before. i couldn't fulfill my promises to my cousins whom i owe a lot of things such as shopping together, playing ps2 (which they haven't returned to me), playing hiroclix, watching dvds, etc. etc. i am such a mess and so is everyone else.

for the past week, i had conversations with people about death. there's a atenean student whose brother was killed when he resisted hold-up. then, there's the youngest son of miriam santiago. then, there's the death of my friend's godfather. what is with this month? i thought all the bad things ended when the week ended, but it seems like the nearer christmas is, the more bad things are happening.

there aren't worthy consolations for me and everyone else. everything just happens so fast. it's been a week since the mariah concert, and it's hard to notice it especially if you have to go to school for six days a week. it's already a wednesday and i was actually shocked to see that it's only 29 days left before christmas?! jeez!